Know Thy Neighbor?

I’ve lived here in New York City for nearly four years and during that time I have never truly met any of my neighbors. And I’m not alone – almost all of my city friends tell me the same is true for them.

Why is that?

In these apartment buildings, with mere paper walls between us, we act as though our neighbors do not exist. There seems to be some heightened sense of desired privacy despite (or maybe due to) the close proximity.

I remember growing up in the suburbs of Boston where neighbors were very familiar. Fresh-baked goods, snow-shoveling, Christmas caroling, and local politics were shared regularly amongst the neighborhood. You knew who lived on either side of you because that was the appropriate way to live. It formed a community. A local safety net.

Why then nowadays are these neighborly connections missing from city life? Is there something that makes us prone to desire isolation the closer we live to one another? Is there truly such strong desire to know nothing about the stories of those down the hall or across the street?

Aside from brief interactions in the laundry room or at my building's entrance, my engagement with my fellow neighbors is sparse and I hope to change that this year.

Isabella and I recently started watching *The Marvelous Ms. Maisel, *which depicts NYC in the mid-'50s. At least by this account, the city was a much more friendly and community-focused place back then. You would absolutely have known your neighbors. So what’s changed?

I’d love to hear your thoughts as I’m still thinking through this one. Here are a couple articles and a Quora discussion I found on the topic as well.

Americans don't know their neighbors anymore-and that's bad for the future of democracy*The traditional myth of small-town America is that neighbors engage in a social contract, wherein they know each other…qz.comWe don't know our neighbors anymore. Here's what that costs us. - The Boston GlobeGet the best of the Magazine's award-winning stories and features right in your Inbox every Sunday. Sign up here. From…*www.bostonglobe.com**Why don't people get to know their neighbors anymore (in the United States)? I was reading that…***Answer (1 of 7): When I was a child, living in a relatively new housing development, all the neighbors knew each other…*www.quora.comThanks for stopping by. I’ll see you tomorrow.